My Role Model - Self Reflection
Updated: Mar 31, 2020
I have a few different role models in my life, but the One and Only role model no other can replace is my mother,Yes her. I have had my ups and down life, struggling with my epilepsy disorder, migraines, headaches, my anxiety and depression. It put through the darkest times of life and yet I made it through, I fought long and hard to get me through it, held me back a bit,but I fought through it long and hard.
I am happy to announce that I have been seizure free for 16 years, and free of any medication,I took a big step and ended my medication treatment after this year and I couldn't be happier to be free of all of it, it was really long overdue, For years my doctor kept insisting to lean me off the medication for years however, I was hesitant to due to the fact that my body was so adjusted to consuming the medication I was worried it may trigger some form of withdrawal, which it did temporarily, but I got through it. It took a few months for my body to adjust but I made it happen. I did it, I took the risk and I couldn't be happier. My childhood was certainly not of the normal that's for sure, my childhood was traumatizing if anything. No child ever wants wake up feeling sick every damn day, gosh where do I even begin. Traumatizing to say the least, from age 6 up until probably around the age of 13 I was constantly hospitalized, my seizures would come and go, on and off, almost every month I was found in the hospital, I would wake up some nights, confused, in a daze and in so much pain. I would wake up vomiting from the pain I had in my head, it almost felt like someone was digging a sharp object into your brain, certainly nothing fun about that if you ask me. From the seizures, to the migraines, the headaches, the episodes what the hell is fun about waking every day and experiencing that for years absolutely nothing. Many things triggered my seizures, lights, noise, certain foods, certain environments, negative energy, even so as odd as that may seem. I am very sensitive to those things in particular, even so stressful environments can trigger it. I can not be in stressful environments either, that tends to trigger people who suffer from seizures, I have noticed over the last few years if I am put in a stressful environment it tends to trigger them as well. What I suffered was pure hell period, not medication, not hospital visit, it was miserable for years hospital visit after hospital visit. I have spent countless nights in hospitals, it certainly took on a significant amount of my depression and anxiety. My childhood was hell,which is probably why my mental health has been affected by it significantly. I am hoping my story brings inspiration to those reading and maybe so some other individuals experience something similar in their life time. I often have these moments now where my depression triggers me intensely and I end up in the hospital that's how much my mental health is certainly not at it's best, but as the years go on I am improve slowly. I wouldn't be able to tell you how many times within the last 25 years I have been hospitalized it's unreal. Certainly is very traumatizing if you ask me, my mental health is something I actively improving on in my daily life and activities.
I refuse to settle for anything less than I deserve in life and get up and keep going. I have decided to share my story with all of course I owe all the support to my biggest Fan. My mother. Yes her. Look how flawless, stunning she is, she's a best friend, Entrepreneur, Mother, Model and above all my Role Model.